Be Reckless.

Just because you’ve never heard about the things that I talk about does NOT mean that everything I say is inaccurate.  I’m not stupid.  I say these things for a reason; why would I lie about something so important?  

“Something always brings me back to you, it never takes too long.  No matter what I say or do, I still feel you here till the moment I’m gone. You hold me without touch, keep me without chains, I never wanted anything so much then to drown in your love and not feel your rain.  Set me free, leave me be, I don’t wanna fall another moment into your gravity.  Here I am, and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.  But you’re onto me, all over me, oh.  You loved me cos I’m fragile, but I thought that I was strong.  But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.  Set me free, leave me be, I don’t wanna fall another moment into your gravity, here I am, and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.  But you’re onto me, and all over me.  I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you’re everything  you think I need here on the ground.  But you’re neither friend or foe though I can’t seem to let you go.  But one thing that I still know is that you’re keeping me down, oohhhhh.  Keeping me down.  You’re onto me, onto me, and all over…something always brings me back to you, it never takes too long.”

Sara Bareilles~Gravity <3

I love my eyes~they change color and are unique

I love my hair~it has many different colors in it and it is curly

I love my lips~they are nicely shaped

I love my hands~they aren’t too big or small

I love my hips~I don’t care what anyone says, they are lovely

I love my personality(sometimes)~it always changes

I love my strength~no matter what, I always seem to push through

I love my talents~art, writing, swimming, children, advice…

I love my creativity and imagination~I can create worlds in my head

I love my music taste~most peope have never heard of what I listen to :)

I love my body~or learning to love it

I love my mind~even though sometimes I cant understand it

I love that I love kids~I cant understand how some people don’t

I love food~I don’t consider it the enemy

I love the fact that I don’t care what other people think about me.  They can mind their own business.

I love how I love to learn new things as long as they interest me

I love how independent I am~shows how well I’ll do when I’m out on my own

I love how I’m able to forget the bad things that have happened but I’ll always remember the lesson that was learned.

I love how I believe in magic and fables at 16 years of age.  IDGAFF :)

I love how when I don’t want someone to understand what I say I write the first letter to each word of the sentence so they think it’s just a bunch of random letters.  But I know. 

I yearn to be on my own.  Free to do/say whatever I want whenever I want.  I want so badly to have my own place, a successful job and find someone who cares and loves me for me.  I want so badly to start my own family and give them everything, to raise them the right way and teach them right from wrong before it’s too late.  I want to decorate my house the way that I want and make it beautiful and clean.  I want to have someone who will hug me at random moments in the day and bring me home little gifts just because.  

I wish to have a fantasy fairy tale life that I KNOW doesn’t exist but I still wish for it and think about how wonderful life would be if I had all those little things.  

I AM MY OWN PERSON whether you know that or not, doesn’t matter.  What matters is that I know it.  And that I’ll achieve all of my naive dreams in life one day and live happily ever after.  You taught me this.

And for that

                       I will always love you the most <3

Sometimes it would  be nice to not be criticized about everything I draw or write by you.  It would be really nice for you to not ‘suggest’ something for me to add on every single time I show you something of mine that I made.  Be happy that I’m expressing myself in some way.

That would be really nice.

I wanna be

where the birds always chirp 

where the grass is always green

because the rain seldom stops 

I wanna be

where the streams flow endlessly 

where the stars shine bright

no clouds to hide behind at nighttime 

I wanna stay

under the covers with you till the afternoon hours

behind a waterfall, gleaming off the suns rays

kissing deeply

I wanna live

in a free atmosphere 

nobody to say no to every dream you can possibly make up

or bring you down to the point of pure and utter exhaustion 

I wanna live

for the first time in my life

I wanna be

cherished 

reckless

loved

surprised

blessed

young

naive 

comfortable

understood

accepted

helpful

intrigued 

myself

free

wild

happy

<3with you<3

and fall asleep on a cloud 

without a care in the world

I wanna be

forever and always more

with you

I won’t let you close enough to hurt me….use your flame to guide me home…I can feel you all around me…he sees the stars come out tonight…it breaks my heart when I look in your eyes, you see me smile but I’m alone inside…my heart is playing tricks on me, and it’s building bricks on me, I can’t break through and I can’t phase you…you know that I hate this song, you know that I hate this song…just stop and listen to your tears, they’re all you’ve got…take me home…one may think we’re alright but we need pills to sleep at night we need lies to make it through the day, we’re not okay…I really love you…I didn’t wanna tell you face to face…I’m tired of feeling so alone…lyin’ underneath those stormy skies…oh I wanna take you home, I wanna give you children, and you might be my girlfriend, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah…there’s nothing like you and I

 Sometimes I just feel like dancing in the rain, not caring who watches because in that moment I’m by myself and I’m in my own little bubble.Sometimes I want to scream out your name, I want to walk until I cant walk anymore, I want to sit in a tree and watch the sunset as you watch the sunrise. I want to sing. I want to sing as loud as my lungs will allow me to. I want to be loved and accepted and understood. I want to run as fast as I can, and I wouldn’t stop until I’m where I’m meant to be. If it were only that easy.  I want to laugh when something is funny or ironic, I want to smile when there is nothing to smile about, I want to lay by you night and day until there are no more days. I want to stand on a mountain with the wind blowing at me, making it hard to stand, laughing…Together, you and me, we can do anything. We can go anywhere and be anyone we want. Just promise me you will stay by my side so that nothing can ever hurt me ever again. When anything unhappy happens I want to cry. I will always have that escape, and I am glad. I want to be comfortable crying in front of anyone, and when its over I want to smile. I want to be able to reassure myself that its only me making the problem seem so big. “It’s almost over” is what I want to be able to tell myself. I want to bake things that I never even knew existed.I want to drive into the night until the sunrise appears. I want to go where I’m needed and appreciated, make other people feel appreciated and loved. I want to help those less fortunate, and be paid with smiles. I want to laugh until I cant breathe anymore and smile until my cheekbones ache from the effort. I want to forgive myself for my past mistakes in one moment, and then move on the next. Never forget, but never hold on too tightly. I want to lay under flowering trees filled with colors that were unimaginable while the sun bursts through, threatening to blind me. I will let your face cover me safely. I want to fly, and not fall. Swim, but not sink. Love, but avoid heartbreak. Remember the past, yet forget it at the same time. I want to be silly when the moment is wrong, and be serious when the moment is right. I need to be myself even though sometimes I forget who ‘myself’ really is. I need to stop pretending that my problems are going to go away by themselves.  But most of all? I need to be with you.

I have joined Tumblr.  We’ll see how long this lasts and how long it will take me to forget that I have this account in the first place :) 

I will try my best to post my daily life on this fantastical site and if I don’t then I don’t but if I do….well then…I do.  

Add me, I will try my best to amuse you.  Though it’ll probably be very boring so beware O_o

HAVE A FANTASTICAL THURSDAY!!! :)

Oh RIGHT by the way, I’m Raewyn :)